Monday 17 September 2012

The Pigs Got Out of the Pig Pen

Here's Sam's response:

Dear Journal,

Frankie the Chicken ran out of the pig pen with the pigs chasing after him. The machine was almost done. All they needed was mud mixed with pig manure that Frankie was running for dear life with, with the pigs chasing after him.

Hurry, Frankie!” Bobby yelled. “That's the last ingredients we need to finish the machine. And we don't need a chicken that's pig food.”

“I'm a chicken! How do you expect me to run faster than pigs? We were designed to be bad runners, you know. Why don't you try running faster than slobbery pigs?”

“I got the spit,” Bobby huffed.

“Out of your own mouth,” Frankie sneered.

“Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Try and fly over the fence of the chicken coop so the pigs can't catch you,” Bobby urged.

“Chickens can't fly, you know.”

“They can for about three seconds.”

“Yeah. And that's going to get me over the fence?”

“Look! A human's coming. Maybe he'll scare the pigs away.”

“Maybe. And maybe he'll just eat us for supper.”

“Remember, that's the last ingredients we need. We'll be eating him for supper.”

“What if it doesn't work?”

“The owl said it would. Owls are the smartest creatures in the whole world.”

“Oh. The human's just driving his car to work. Okay. I'm going to try flying. One... two... three... four...”

Just then, Frankie flew over the fence and fell into the chicken coop.

“Yrgradhgrrahhyyrrstch.”

“Pig talk,” Frankie said.

“Didja get it? Didja get it? Didja get it?” Peater asked.

“Yes. I got it.”

“Okay. Then let's fire up the machine.”

“Who'd like to push the button?”

“Duckie, would you like to?”

“Yup! Yup! Yup!”

“Now all the chickens in the barnyard will become gigantic!”

“Yay!” all the chickens yelled.

“Three... Two... One... Pushing!” Duckie said.

“I'm a vegetarian,” Jakey said.

“You don't have to eat them. We just want to for the fun of it. You can just sit down and play around.”

All of a sudden, before anyone could say another sentence, they all grew as big as a barn.

“Yay! Eeeee! Yeah! Yeah! Yay!” all the chickens yelled.

“Wyagyack,” Wakey the Pig said.

All the pigs ran out of the pig pen with a whole bunch of giant chickens chasing them.

“I'm gonna eat you with a side of bacon,” Duckie said.

“They are bacon,” Frankie corrected.

“Well, then I'm gonna eat you with a side of lettuce.”

“I'm tired,” Sleepy yawned.

“Well, we have some humans to eat and a world to take over. Let's see how they like being eaten with basil and garlic.”

“I'm gonna eat them with barbeque sauce,” Wookie said.

“The chickens are coming! The chickens are coming!” the maid of the house said.

“The sky is falling,” Chicken Little said.

“You mean the rain is falling from the sky.”

“No. The sky is falling!”

They looked up and saw a whole bunch of army helicopters trying to bomb them.

“We need to fly up and grab those helicopters. Can anyone fly?”

“I can fly for four seconds,” Frankie said.

Well, that will do.”

“What does this button do,” Sleepy asked.

“No! That will shrink us!”

Psshew. They all started to shrink.

“What does this button do?” Sleepy pointed to a red button that said DO NOT PUSH.

“No! That's self-destruct! DO NOT PUSH!”

Sleepy pushed it.

“Now we're going to be eaten with basil and garlic. And it's all Sleepy's fault.”

“What did I do?” Sleepy asked.

Love,
Sam
2001

Prompt for Sept 13

Mickey didn't like his supper

Lizzie's response is fabulous. I'm asking her to post it.

Back At It

We're back to school work and 9-year-old Sam is trying to qualify for homeschooling this month. So we're doing 30 minute writes again. In Sam's case, he's dictating while I scribe his story. He has writing practice separately. I'm astonished at the creativity and flow of his stories. So we're posting again.

Oh, and Meg's response to the first writing prompt was surprising in another way. Yikes. I never guessed my sweet Meg would be so good at horror.

First prompt, from Sept 12, 2012 was: My dog buried a bone in the back yard.

Here's Sam's response:

Dear Journal,

My dog buried a bone in the back yard while we were looking for dinosaur bones.

"Snoopy," I said, "You're supposed to put that in the bowl." Then I realized it was a turkey bone, and I said, "Oh. You found that from the table. You can keep it."

Snoopy barked something and I'm pretty good at understanding animals. I said, "Perfect idea. We'll dig to China! Wait, Snoopy. That was a lame idea. How on earth could we dig to China in one day?"

All of a sudden, we heard a loud noise: Beep, beep, beep, beep. It was a tractor. Before I could say another word, Snoopy ran as fast as light and pushed the driver off the seat and onto the road. He was knocked out.

"Well," my best friend Will said, "we have a tractor and your parents are gone... so... let's not let it go to waste. All in favour, raise your hand."

Snoopy raised a paw, Will raised his hand, Russell raised his, and at last I raised mine.

I walked over to Will and said, "My parents are going to get me busted."

"I guess so... but not if we're in China," Will said.

"Does anybody know how to work this thing?" Russell asked.

Snoopy started jumping up and down. Before anybody could say, "No, Snoopy," he got on the tractor and started digging.

Russell pointed at ta big long digging tool and said, "We could use that instead of the shovel tool."

Snoopy drilled about six holes in the chimney before he got it aimed in the right direction. Russell decided that he should do it instead, but he was a little short. He accidentally drilled a hole in the dining room. So Will tried. Will was absolutely perfect except he didn't know where the brakes were. By the time he found the brakes, the house was in ruins. It looked like an atom bomb had just fallen on it.

There was one problem though. Right before Will found the brakes, he accidentally smashed Dad's new Lamborghini and Mom's new Jeep.

I decided it was my turn, so I jumped into the tractor and did it perfectly.

"At least your parents aren't coming home 'til tomorrow morning," Russell said.

"Yeah. Pretty good thing."

All of a sudden, the drill stopped drilling and we felt a nice, cold breeze from night. We had made it to China. But we figured out it was actually Snoopy's cold breath breathing on us. Apparently he had just eaten frozen fish from the shop.

"Bad Snoopy," I said. "You know you're not supposed to eat frozen fish from the shop."

"Ruff!" Snoopy said.

"Well, you're right. We're not supposed to dig to China with a stolen tractor, either."

"Why did the drill stop drilling though, "Will asked.

Russell looked. "It looks like Snoopy found a piece of a sausage on the brakes and lied on them and started eating it."

"Well, let's get back to work. China's not gonna dig itself down," Will said.

All of a sudden, we heard a loud noise. "It's the sound of our car that's not broken. I'm busted," I said.

"What kind of a car?" Will said.

"Oh, a rusted old truck."

"I wish we broke that instead of the Lamborghini and Jeep," Will said.

"Well, my parents are already thinking of taking it to the junkyard and having it smashed," I said.

"Probably not anymore. That's your only car left."

"Rrrr! Rrrr! Rrrr!"

"No, we can't hurry and dig to China. We've only dug 20 feet."

"Rrr. Rrr. Rrrr."

"You don't have super paws that will help us."

"Roo!"

"Do not..."

"Girls, girls! You're both pretty! We have to do something about this," Will said.

"Yes you do, young men!"

"Mom and Dad!"

"Hello son, or should we call you 'Destroyer of the Home'?"

Snoopy, Russell and Will all pointed at me and blabbered on about how it was all my fault. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blech.

Please make them stop!

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blech.

Love,

Sam.